Parenting. The hardest fucking job in the world.

Today we made the decision to tell our daughter to leave our home.  She is 20 years old and although we were proud as hell that she finally got a job and was working toward being able to live independently alas....  The lie.

Most people will find me a very evil mother but I did my best.

She graduated from Hubert H. Humphrey Job Corps this year and everything was looking great.  She got a job unfortunately not a drivers license along with it.  I had no problem driving her to work but I also kept on her to get a license.  I always thought it odd that a job she was hired to work 35 hours a pay period she wasn't being scheduled those hours.  She would get off early or not be scheduled for 2 weeks.  I would question her about it and got a very negative Taurus response.  This has been almost 3 months now.

Last night I heard a rumor....small towns ya know.

One of her co-workers had stated that she likes to leave work early and asks for a lot of days off.  Well this infuriated me to say the least but I called her as she is up north on vacation with her girlfriend.  Confronted her about the rumor and told her I was going to call her manager to confirm this.  Already I knew she had been lying as I could hear the tears.  I told her if in fact this was true she would have to move out.  I'm tired of dealing with her fantasy land of make believe where her parents take care of her for life while she sits around playing games, choosing when she will work etc.

Now I'm the mom who when she got in trouble as a young child, stealing and stuff, I took her to the police personally to have a chat.  I don't let her get away with nothing.  I have consequences to not behaving like a responsible adult.  

I called her today to give her the opprotunity to tell me the truth.  She chose to not speak to me but have her girlfriend make up excuses as to why she couldn't answer the phone.  By not talking to me she has confirmed that what I heard was in fact the truth.

So, she has decided to come get her shit.  Time for a real world wake up call.  In two months when her girlfriends mother starts threatening her life again I will direct her to the nearest shelter.  Her girlfriend doesn't work either.  Good Luck.

I will not rescue her again from this family that she is in such denial about.

I must turn my heart cold in order for her to start using those wings and flying.

Parenting sucks.

To you Alyssa

Death Race 3000

Hell, at least the title got you.  We begin our blog from 4 nights ago.

Scene:  Family is happily sleeping other than I of course.  I am reclined on the couch with my trusty June Bug Killer, Loki, when from the corner of my eye what do I see.......Why a tricky little mouse with some huge ego.  She stared at me from the cover of the chair fabric.  Sizing me up.  Wondering in her little Ninja skills if she could scurry across the room hit the wall and make her way over to the dog dish where a plethra of kibble awaited her twitching whiskers.  I shall call my nemesis, Trinity, because the little bitch moves like she were in the Matrix.

Don't let that cute little face fool you.  She is a professional whore and is happily breeding under my trailer.  My first experience with Trinity was when I was sitting on my throne doing my business.  My husband had repaired the floor in the bathroom and of course left a hole around the pipes big enough for an army of ninja mice to get through.  As I sat there, again, from the corner of my eye I see a moving object.  Damned if it was a very pregnant Trinity shooting past into the bathroom in my direction when she did a matrix move and shot right under me and down the hole.  Where the hell is Loki?  Damn dog is part rat terrier why isn't he trying to nab her!

Now mice around here aren't anything new but the little bastard's are getting smarter.  

Once we no longer had professional killers around (cats) the little bastard's got wise to my glue traps.  Oh sure I caught about 10 of them but I think they have a special gene splicing lab under my refrigerator where they are breeding specialty mice.  Breeding out dim mice that easily go for the bait and become stuck to Ninja mice that manage to jump around, over and maybe even through a time warp tunnel through said traps.  (It could happen)

So Trinity has set forth her genetically altered offspring and they won't step on the glue traps.  By the way for those of you who don't like to kill your prey, you can safely get them off said glue traps by pouring vegetable oil around them on the trap.  I watched a video doing just that.

So I says to myself, "self, you need to find a better mouse trap"  So I did extensive research on the subject (lots of youtube videos) and found some awesome contraptions.  One I already knew about as my uncle used to use it but I don't feel like drowning the mouse just moving them to another county.

So the other day my purchase arrived...

The Eaton, J.T. Repeater Multiple Catch Mouse Trap

I got three of them!  Sleek and stylish metal trap with two ways in and one way out (me) it also has a fabulous upper window so you don't have to shake the trap to hear the squeeling mouse within you just look.  This trap also has the added feature of air holes in the sides so I can give the scent of mutant mouse to Loki without hurting said mouse.  I can see the training now...

O.K. Loki, Mommy wants you to catch the mouse.

"Duh, the June Bug?"

No, boy, the mouse, here sniff this.

"Um, I smell peanut butter"

Yes, Loki, but that's the bait, smell the small furry creature inside past the peanut butter smell.

"Um, piss?"

No, boy, that is correct the furry creature wet itself but that isn't the mouse."

"OOO OOO OOO, something moved in there Mom!"

Yes, Loki, that moving little creature is the mouse and it's up to you to protect Mommy from them.

"But it has such cute sad eyes Mom"

Look past it Loki, it is a genetically mutant mouse that wants to eat YOUR FOOD!

"WHAT THE FUCK!  I shall get you mouse!  No one eats my food except maybe Bella"

So that is pretty much how our conversation would go.

All the while Trinity is in her secret lab continuing to do training on her mutant offspring.

I know she uses shock therapy because when she is working the lights dim.

So, after the night she shot across the floor in front of me with mocking laughter I decided to get out my peppermint essential oil.  Mice don't like the smell apparently and I haven't seen Trinity in a few days.  So, I have my new traps set up one under the chair she likes to move through and another one under my art table where she heads to the wall.  Baited it will a smear of peanut butter because who knew that if you give them a big blob of peanut butter it can kill them cause they aren't able to puke.  So, just a smear of temptation on the walkway, a tiny blob on the inside with doggy kibble placed in it.  I should have known after the peppermint oil it is going to take a bit for her to show her face again as the traps were empty this morning.

I SHALL GET YOU TRINITY!

Some days you have to wonder....

It has been a wild month (May).  Seems topsy turvy in all the most strange ways.

Lets review shall we?

Weather in Minnesota:  We now have 5 official seasons up here.  Summer, Fall, Winter, Sprinter and Spring.  All of which seem to happen in the month of May.  It has snowed, thawed, heated up, dropped back down, torrential rains, snow again etc.  All in one month mind you...  It is now June 3rd and I have heard a rumor there is supposed to be a frost warning....  WTF

I don't know whether to bring out the lawn mower or snow shovel!

So that's weather now onto other news.

Those who have listened to the Sit a Spell show on Jackalope Radio most likely know that we are all about helping people.  Well, for the most part I help others out in little ways that mean a lot.  My Father in law past away in September and my husband received a small inheritance.  My husband and I made a decision about helping one person out in a HUGE way.  I have a neighbor who is 52 yrs old with two kids living at home ages 16 and 19 and she works her tail off at a job that doesn't appreciate her nor gives her enough hours to make a decent life for herself.  She has never taken any kind of public assistance and I have no idea how she stretches a dollar as far as she does and yet she would give you the shirt off her back or her last dollar to help you out.  Well, she lives in a mobile home that has seen better days.  The roof, horrible and it rains down inside her house.  The ceilings are starting to fall in the mold from all the wet is messing with their health and she is just plain overwhelmed by it all.

So......  I have her come over one day and we were all chatting and having a grand time when I pulled out two plastic Easter eggs.  I told her to pick one of the eggs and look inside.  So she picks an egg and starts to open it.  Held inside is a small piece of paper with a message on it which she squints to read...(she never remembers her reading glasses)

At first their is confusion on her face that moves onto disbelief into shock into the words... "no, no, no, you can't do that, no, really you guys can't do that, OMG, OMG, REALLY?"  I'm expecting heart failure at any moment and have the cardiac paddles nearby.  You see written on that piece of paper were the words....  YOUR GETTING A NEW HOUSE.

After 20 minutes of convincing her that, yes, she was actually going to get a new home her face lit up with joy through the tears.  She called her son at college and told him.  He was shocked and over joyed and thanked us as he had been so worried about his mom that he was considering quitting college.  She called her daughter who also had a mini heart failure exploding with joy.  That was 6 weeks ago and today she is in a newer mobile home and the joy on their faces brighten our days.

There are people out there that have said to us like we are crazy, "Why, would you do that?"  Quite a lot of people actually ask that and our response is.....  "Because we were able to and it was the right thing to do."  People need to stick together more than ever in these crazy times.  Even little things can mean so much to someone from a smile to an ear willing to listen and sometimes when you are able....do something really big just once.

Now onto the crazy crap...........

I have another neighbor.....  He asked me if he could dig up some of my Tiger Lillies for his garden.  I said, sure!  Dig em all out.  (I have tried everything to kill them buggers off, they should be called Cockroach Lillies)  This was 2 months ago.....  Haven't seen nor heard anything further on the subject.  I was beginning to think he decided against it TILL............  At 2:37 AM today he was outside with a headlamp on starting to dig those damn things up.  I repeat....  2:37 AM

We promptly told him to stop....  who in their right fucking mind starts digging up Cockroach Lillies at 2:37 am!  We told him to come back when normal people are fucking awake.  He obviously had way to much beer in him (it was bonfire night) and most likely some other illegal substance that made him super hyper...  And this is where the title of this blog comes from.  I sometimes look at him and have to wonder.  Good Lord, we have all kinds around here!

So, I'm off...  Be good and if you can't be good name it after me.

:)

Do something nice for someone each day and lets make this a better world to live in!

Death and the Empath

Death and the Empath.  Interesting concept especially when the dying is talking to me from the hospital in his between world state.

Tuesday night my Father in Law past away.  I got a call from my husband from the hospital that they had given him last rites.  Vince and his brother told him it was o.k. for him to go, they would take care of everything.  At home I'm being yelled at, "I ain't going, I ain't going damn it"

Vince came home to get something to eat and chill for a bit and then we got a call from his brother, Craig, that he should come back to the hospital as Dad was going fast.  I got dressed and as usual when I am in the bathroom I hear Dad saying, "Don't leave without me, Don't leave without me"  I knew he was talking to Mom who was there to take him home and I knew he would be dead before we got there.  We were 5 minutes from the hospital when Craig called and said he is already dead.  Vincent went into a fury and almost took us off the slippery icy road into the ditch.

They both wanted to be there when he went but Clem was not about to allow that to happen.  You see there had been bad blood between the three of them for the last 5 years.  Clem liked to pit his boys against each other telling one that the other one did this or that when in fact he hadn't.  His need for control over all situations seemed to give him a twisted pleasure that increased more and more since Faye died in 2004.

Clem did have his good qualities.  He adored his grand daughters.  His OCD got in the way of him maintaining a relationship with my daughter.  After Faye died, Alyssa grieved for a year and a half and when she would be at his house for the weekend and would start crying about Faye, Clem would get upset and tell her to stop it, get over it.  There were other things that pushed her away from him to the point that she will not be attending the funeral Tuesday.

The problem being an Empath during a time of death in these circumstances is I am the outward expression of sorrow and anger my husband continues to hold in.  I am not able to block his emotional turmoil and he thinks my behavior is coming from me and not mirroring what he is holding within.  I have had to seperate from him and stop talking to him today.  He has to deal with his mourning and I have my own..  I can't do both.

So from today until Tuesday at 9am when the funeral is......will be very interesting.

xoxo


I did it my way.........